At John Jay College, we actively aim to create an environment that promotes inclusivity, celebrates differences, and fosters fairness and equality for all. In honor of Pride Month, we’re applauding the strength, talent, and unity of John Jay’s LGBTQ+ community by featuring some of its proudest members.
Sam Ascencio ’23 changed his major to a CUNY BA for Queer Education Reform for a very specific reason. “My dream is to come back to John Jay and work in the LGBTQ+ Resource Center. I love John Jay so much. I love the queer community at John Jay so much,” he says with an infectious smile. “I just want to work there forever.” We sat down with Ascencio, who has been the Vice President of John Jay’s LGBTQ+ Allies Club (now known as Spectra) and the Founder/Director of Q’onnections, to learn more about his pride in the queer community, his excitement for Pride Month, and his hopes for the future.
What does Pride Month mean to you?
I describe Pride as spirit. It’s knowing within yourself that you come from a long proud lineage that has always fought for itself. You are the same kind of person who threw a brick at Stonewall, that threw coffee at the Cooper Do-nuts Riot, and that doesn’t just take no for an answer. You are the same person who knows who you are—and will always know who you are—and can love yourself just as you are. Pride is the ability to acknowledge that strength and love within yourself. Pride is the ability to create a family where none existed prior. Pride is the ability to get up and keep going with just as much flare and color as any other day.
“Pride is the ability to acknowledge that strength and love within yourself. Pride is the ability to create a family where none existed prior. Pride is the ability to get up and keep going with just as much flare and color as any other day.” —Sam Ascencio
How are you celebrating Pride?
I have gone to the Aids Memorial and I’m planning on going to the Queer Liberation March. A lot of what I have been doing is creating queer content. I like to create content with an old AOL, ’70s, and ’80s aesthetic. What I do is talk about different terminologies. Like, what is lesbian? What is queer? What is gay? What is demi-sexual? I talk about what that really means and how we define it. I’m also looking to highlight queer-centered creators and owners. I’m also redecorating my room and thinking about where I stand in terms of the history.
Why is it important for our country to celebrate Pride Month?
It’s important for a number of reasons. The Christopher Street Liberation March was not just a one-day thing. It was an everyday thing. One in 10 people in your classroom or office is probably queer and you don’t even know it. Oftentimes, these people have been marginalized; they have been attacked. It’s hard to feel wanted when you are told that you are “out of the norm.” A lot of people like to say “we’re diverse,” but that diversity ends up becoming, “Queer people are just like you.” No. We’re not just like you. Nobody chooses to be this. Nobody chooses to be hurt this way, but people choose to love the way they do and a whole month is not enough to support that. We celebrate Pride to show that there is a history that we will not ignore.
“One in 10 people in your classroom or office is probably queer and you don’t even know it.” —Sam Ascencio
What do you hope for the future of the LGBTQ+ community?
Title IX. I feel like a lot of trans folks aren’t really seen, not even in queer spaces. There is a revolution starting to happen, but it hasn’t fully come to fruition. Title IX is one of those things where you have to recognize that queer discrimination is happening, and it hurts students a lot.
I also believe one of the things that need to change is education. I don’t think there are a lot of queer scholars getting paid to teach queer curriculum. I hope that we’re going to see more queer educators so that we change how society sees gender. I’m talking about queer scholars who have intersectionality—Black queer scholars, Jewish queer scholars, Latinx queer scholars. It’s going to happen, I know it’s going to happen, and John Jay is going to be at the forefront.
Do you see yourself becoming one of those queer scholars educating future generations?
I’m working toward it. McNair has been a really big supporter of me. I’m working a lot with Dr. Nina Rose Fischer right now and we won the Lavender Audrey Lorde award together. We’ve been working on service provisions for students, focusing on who the people are who work in queer spaces, and how to change and increase these services for students. I have really learned a lot about how I see myself in the world, why I create the content that I do, and why I want to research it more.
“For a lot of my life, people didn’t know that I was attacked for being trans. I was spit on. I was told that I didn’t belong and that nobody wanted me.” —Sam Ascencio
What did it mean to you to receive the Lavender Audrey Lorde award?
I cried. For a lot of my life, people didn’t know that I was attacked for being trans. I was spit on. I was told that I didn’t belong and that nobody wanted me. During the pandemic, I’ve had to deal with deadnaming and the feeling like there are no safe spaces. I’ve also had to face a lot of realities, like a lot of my Latinx and trans siblings are dying in custody. It’s hard to want to speak out, especially because I end up being the only trans person in a lot of spaces. So, winning the award was emotional because it was the first time I truly felt seen and heard. I was getting a lot of DMs saying, “Thank you for your support.” And, “You mean so much to me.” A lot of people call me “dad” in the community because I tell them that I love them and I’m proud of them. Receiving the award was like my community dropping down a “reverse Uno card” saying, we’re proud of you.
“Privilege isn’t just getting the perks in life, like money. It’s also the lack of obstacles that you have to face.” —Sam Ascencio
What do you want allies of the LGBTQ+ community to know?
Ally-ship is a journey. Ally-ship is a term that you have to fight every day to earn. I know this is going to sound a little controversial, but as much as I love Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, stop talking about them. That shouldn’t be your only frame of reference. Be on the field. Be in the community. Be supportive. Call out your friends if they say something discriminatory. Say, “As a queer ally, when you say things like that, it’s really painful. Thank you for listening to me even if you don’t accept it.” Educate yourself and create brave spaces. Brave spaces are where we learn to be active citizens in our communities. People who have privilege need to be part of that conversation. Privilege isn’t just getting the perks in life, like money. It’s also the lack of obstacles that you have to face. Realizing that you have a lack of obstacles as a cis-hetero person and as a non-queer individual is important. Allies need to be part of the fight.
How do all of the different LGBTQ+ communities come together at John Jay College?
We’re a family. Everyone is so supportive. If there are tears shed, we all cry. If we’re sad, we’re sad together. I think at some point, we just forget that we’re queer. One day, I looked at my friend and I totally forgot that they were a bi-sexual. It just slipped my mind. In those spaces, you don’t have to redefine yourself, you just are who you are.
